I read this somewhat peculiar quote recently that goes like:
"Sometimes you need to push the water down to keep the boat afloat".
It was quite bizarre at first if I am being honest, but as moments lingered and time took its usual due course to thrust some sense into me, I was made to see what I so boldly chose to ignore previously- you often need to undertake the unconventional stuff, possibly impossible and maybe sometimes even illogical, to keep certain things running in their infallible order. Moreover, you are never out of options and I feel like knowing that just gives you some kind of satisfying hope to lodge on.
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Admittedly, there's a fair chunk of things and experiences I would never be able to put into words and even for the ones I do, I don't think I'll ever be able to do justice to them. And thus, this book doesn't stand as some trivial attempt to do so but rather a whimsical collection of these purely intoxicating sensations life rendered to me on a silver plate.
Love was found and subsequently, a lot was lost. I fought hard battles and I continue to do so now. I doubted my decisions only to make my faith restored in them again. I burnt the town I once painted red and murdered unfounded desires to let myself be finally free from the blackmailing of those wretched traitors. I went through hell, fought my demons there and returned with a newfound perspective to this 80-year old journey and well, a scarred heart. Furthermore, though this heart, I speak of, did go through a hefty amount of quasi-heroic struggles, it is now more willing to face the challenges as they come than ever.
This book stands as a goodbye to this chapter of my life, if I am being honest. And I guess, this was my way of bidding farewell to these deranged emotions and one-to-one encounters with life. For me, it will always remain as something I will always look back at and value because it taught me these innumerable lessons that makes me feel one step closer to who I actually want to be.
However, if you ever wish to revisit what I did once, more specifically what it felt like- I welcome you to my latest release, Supernova.
It's quite strange to look back at certain moments and think that they really happened. In the sense, you could never would have been able to see it coming in any manner or made things line up in a way that they make it happen the way it all did. Like out of the blue, a coin thrown in the well turns dreams in living embodiment and you connect dots and wonder, if it was all part of some mystic prophecy we term as destiny.
I've wanted different things than what I've received. And being ungrateful for them is something I still resent myself for. I think we stop realizing the value of things once we have it and you never consider how much of magnanimous effect it would be if it is taken away until it is. So, I feel it has always been for the better, or I hope so that it has, that I got the things that I never knew wanted but realized I was better off with them than the ideas my mind fabricated to keep itself satiated. While I looked for delusions or oases to my thirst for short-term validations, life had its own plan I tend to discreetly say in knowing-ness of its propensity as a cliche.
It was never easy but then again, no one told me it would be. At the end of the day I just try to feel thankful for everything that took its time to show up, or not show up actually. My words had ears to listen to them and even when they went unheard, I now realize they were just being redirected to a different point of disembarkation. More specifically, a 'good' different one.
This very moment, I can't regret any actions of mine, however murky or wrong they might have been, because I'm glad for this instant right now, where I got more than what I asked and it's only the combination ecstatic and semi-toxic moments that have led to one where I am more satisfied and peaceful with life than happy about it; I have learnt to like it more this way, anyway.
Time to know the author behind this book - Md. Faiz Yusuf in his own words:
My name is Md Faiz Yusuf and I am 20 years old. Currently pursuing Economics Honours from Ashoka University, I am inclined towards writing, reading and music. I wrote my first book at the age of 12 and since then have got an opportunity to get two books published under my name including “Pictures of Life” and “The Farrago”.Throughout my school life, I have taken part in numerous inter-school literary competitions, being a part of Times of India Junior Editor Board as well as bagging prizes in various National Youth Parliaments and MUNs. Furthermore, I am a recipient of Scholars’ Badge and have recently started performing Slam Poetry, one of my performances being featured on the official You Tube channel of 'Your Quote'.I have interned for Harper Collins Publishers India and Penguin Random House India as well as have done Poetry Workshop from California Institute of Arts. I’ve also had the opportunity of working for United Nations Global Compact and UNESCO.I look forward to my upcoming summer semester at London School of Economics.In addition to having done online courses from Harvard University, California Institute of Arts and United Nationals Council of Research, I have been consistently good at studies, including receiving a letter of appreciation from Education Minister of India. Being an avid public speaker and have written for various magazines, I wish to pursue a career in Economics while keeping my zest for writing animate.
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P.S: This book is releasing soon. So stay tuned to this space for more exciting things about this book to follow including a review, an author interview and also the link from where you can buy your own copy!